Exploring Identity

Be who you want to be

Storytelling is one of the defining characteristics of the human experience. We tell stories to entertain each other, to explain difficult concepts, to understand and find deeper meaning in ourselves, the world around us, and our relationships with others.

We also tell ourselves stories subconsciously.  These are the stories that give definition, depth and texture to our self identity. They can liberate us to be our best selves. Or they can limit us, subconsciously holding us down. But the storytelling is not a fixed event.

These stories aren’t fate. You can rewrite them simply by telling yourself a different one, and in doing so, fundamentally alter, edit, enhance and improve your self identity.

How would it be to tell yourself the story of a version of yourself that doesn’t get anxious in crowds? Has confidence in yourself, just the way you are? How would it be to tell yourself the story of a version of you that is comfortable being vulnerable? And how would it be to find a way to really believe that story? To feel it wrap around the core of your self-identity and become you?

So that’s got to be hard, right? It’s going to have to take a lot of work, right?

Well, the reality is it will be as hard as you make it. Because to truly change your story all you need is to believe in a new one. The catch (yes there’s a catch) is that you have to truly believe it. You can’t really fake it to make it. At some level, when you’re faking, it you are still holding on to the old story.

So the trick is to find a way to unlock that old story. And here’s the science bit. All the information that defines our Self is held on a distributed network of neural pathways. These organising systems have become set and rigid over time. They can be made flexible enough to accept new information or they can be superseded by a new pathway.

Being the wonderfully complex, unique creatures that we are, finding the way to unlock the old network can be tricky. The most important thing is to make sure you are being true to your authentic self. So, take your time and make sure the changes you make feel right. Learn to be present and in contact with your authentic voice.

And don’t forget to have some fun along the way!